maybe too personal

I just finished my first business card. I mean, the first one I've done all on my own. woo hoo! Thanks to Kyle for the program and Matt for basically setting up the first one for me. I'm hoping I did everything right and it won't have to be changed a ton when it gets sent to be printed.

Sometimes I think I'm too patient. Maybe patient is not the right word. I think being patient is a good thing... who wants to be one of those people who flip out when they have to wait for something? Like the people you see at Starbucks who tap their foot because they have to wait two minutes for their mocha? Well, I guess I'm not talking about that sort of patience. I'm talking about long term, just live your life, don't worry about it, it will happen when it does patience. You know that kind? I have to wait to graduate, wait to get a job that I love, wait to move out, wait to know who I'll marry and it goes on. I say wait to know my husband because I'm fighting against becoming one of those typical girls who unknowingly can't wait to fall in love; the type that think being married is a solution. Well, I'm really not going to become one of them. The majority of me thinks that I'm young, that I have an entire lifetime to do those things- the moving out and working and graduating and being in love things. But, there is still a bit of me that screams that it's been long enough... that I'm too patient... that I let people walk all over me... that I'm not ambitious enough. And it might just be that I need a combination of both- of ambition and patience. I'm still working on figuring that out. But you know, there is always something to figure out. That's life I think. It would be totally boring if we had everything figured out. But, it shouldn't stop us from getting what we really want. And this makes me question a lot that happens. Of course things seem so much sweeter when you wait to have them. If we got everything we wanted when we wanted it, what joy would that be? But, it's the confidence that things will be right eventually that makes me hopeful. And, I'm positive that they will be perfect. That's faith... being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. But, you know... I'm not really sure of where I'm going with this. I don't have a big conclusion. Just that I shouldn't worry so much; that I should rely on God with more confidence... and that I shouldn't be so patiently blinded by the reality of some things. The reality that if someone really wanted something they would go after it; knowing there will always be something more to figure out. But maybe I'm all wrong and time makes things better and wiser. Or that the best way to get what you really want is to give it time. I'm just not sure.